a) At the age of six, my father began to give me English lessons.
b) When I was five years old, my father began to give me English lessons.
分析:a) 句子,At the age of six 放在這個位置上,變成了"我父親六歲的時候"。改變說法,可以解決這個問題。
例 3:
a) To improve one's writing skill, regular practice is necessary.
b) To improve one's writing skill, one must make regular practice.
分析:不定式短語的邏輯主語決不是regular practice,為了把邏輯關系表達清楚,要么把不定式短語改成If one wants to improve his writing skill,要么把主句改成one must make regular practice.
4.表示相同的意思,檢查是否使用了平行語法結構。
例 4:
a) With the computer, one can do shopping, banking and read at home.
b) With the computer, one can do shopping, banking and reading at home.
分析:can do shopping, banking and read at home, 用語法平行結構來衡量,用動詞原形 read是不妥的,為了和 do shopping, do banking 保持結構上平行,接下來的一個內容要用do reading.
例 5:
a) Nowadays, people not only eat enough food, but also eat better.
b) Nowadays, people not only eat more, but also eat better.
用 not only...but also, both...and, whether...or, either...or, as well as, along with等能連接兩個成分的連詞,前后兩個成分在結構上要保持一致。用 eat enough food, eat better不如用 eat more, eat better,都用副詞。
5. 用代詞時,檢查指代關系是否清楚。
例1:
a) Sometimes teachers will inform students of the heavy burden theyhave to bear.
b) Sometimes a teacher will inform students of the heavy burden he has to bear.
分析:they 既可指代teachers, 也可指代 students,明顯的是指代不清。其實只要把其中一個名詞變成單數,用he和 they分別代不同的名詞,就清楚了。因為 a teacher也可泛指所有教師。
例2:
a) Someone believes that the teacher's task is to give students knowledge, which may not be true.
b) Someone believes that the teacher's task is to give students knowledge, a notion which may not be true.
分析:which指代什么不清楚,指 knowledge,還是指前面整個句子?如果指 Someone believes,最好用 a notion或an idea歸納一下整個句子的意思,然后引出從句。
例3:
a) People have been fighting against the influence of TV commercials, but it often proves useless.
b) People have been fighting against the influence of TV commercials, but the effort often proves useless.
分析:it 指什么?如指influence,則在 it often proves useless 這個句子中顯然不通。寫作人知道it指人們的努力,但effort 這個詞前面沒有出現過,就不能用it。
6. 相鄰的句子,檢查是否避免了不必要的結構轉變
例4:
a) While we reuce the number of vehicles, the speed of traffic can be increased.
b) While the number of vehiles is reduced, the speed of traffic is increased.
注意:兩個非常相關的意思,不要一個使用主動結構,一個使用被動結構。
7.檢查可數名詞與不可數名詞是否用得正確
例5:
a) TV presents us with many useful informations.
b) TV presents us with a lot of useful information.
分析:還有evidence, advice, knowledge等都是不可數名詞,都不能用復數。另外, many, a great number of, another, few 等只能與可數名詞配用。而a great amount of, a great deal of, less, much, 等應與不可數名詞配用。
例6:
a) Making our cities greener is not an easy work.
b) Making our cities greener is not an easy job.
分析:work 用作可數名詞是"作品"這類意思,而表示"工作"時,不可數。同樣,在 Word has been sent out that those who cheat on exams will be punished.這個句子中,要用單數word表示"信息"。